it makes me crazy to think of the people i've shared little parts of myself with. i want to take it all back. i want to gather up all those things i've given away and bury them in the woods with voodoo dolls. everything seems to be on someone else's terms. people make you do things and make it seem like it was your own idea. that's the skill of manipulation in practice. a person can only take so many derailments before she jumps off the train for good. pretending to be selfless is even more unappealing than being openly selfish; even animals know they have to take what they want.