nothing ever surprises me. i can always predict the outcome of everything, relationships and encounters. i could have written the story of my life from start to finish on the day i was born. i wish, just once, i could be blown away by how something turns out. i'm not saying that good things don't happen. i'm just saying that even good things are tarnished when you can see them coming. and the bad ones too. impervious, unconcerned, unimpressed, unresponsive, unstirred, untouched, indifferent.